Thoughts and memories about brother Craig Ponder
By Don Henderson Epsilon Chi 1962
During Craig’s memorial, several speakers spoke of their memories of him. Unfortunately, sitting in the back of a church when one has poor hearing is not conducive to hearing everything. Some of the things I was able to hear reminded of why Craig had been a good friend. His brother spoke of Craig’s first car, a 1951 Studebaker, with a space in the trunk for the spare tire. Craig iced his beer down in this area. (Fraternity practice for later?) A commonality among of all the speakers indicated Craig’s love of a good joke; especially dirty ones. Another thing was clear; Craig was good at everything he did. Well, there was an exception. Football was not one of his accomplishments. If you know anything about Port Neches, you know that it is a football town. Everything revolved around football. Craig’s physical attributes did not match well for sports, especially not football. As I set hearing some of these things, I was thinking of some of my own memories.
Ardis Havard called me Jan 7 at about 3:30 in the afternoon to tell me news that I did not want to hear. At the time I did not think I would be able to go, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought I needed to be there. Ardis had indicated that he and Kay would be unable to attend. It wasn’t until today when I received an email from Ardis that I realized, Ardis, Kay, and I were all there at Craig’s memorial. We never saw each other. Maybe they can supply more about the memorial.
The passing of Brother Craig Ponder came as sad news for us all. More than anyone that has recently passed, Craig’s passing seemed to squarely strike home. This past year I have lost several very good high school friends, a few work friends and my dear sister in law and father in law, but the passing of Craig was different. Although I had not seen Craig in at least 20 years; my last memory of him was as my son’s doctor. My youngest son, Blake, injured his knee while playing soccer and we went to Dr. Ponder for a second opinion. Craig and I discussed our ’88 Reunion that we had recently attended. I guess what struck me most is that it has now been more than 20 years since I last saw him. We all go about our daily lives, pursuing our careers, taking care of our families, getting through each day and suddenly twenty years have passed. Some of the people that you considered friends are no longer in your immediate circle; therefore you tend to lose contact with them.
It’s funny how our circle of friends expands, changes and ultimately shrinks. We all have known our childhood friends, some we still have contact with. Our circle of friends also includes our immediate family, church, our work, our college, including our Sig brothers. Recently I attended my own 50 year high school class reunion and as any reunion it placed me in a reflective mood. Some that attended my reunion have already passed away. During this time of reflection, we all begin to reevaluate our lives, realizing that God did not build us to last forever.
When I attended Craig’s memorial service Jan 8, 2009, I was impressed with all that Craig had accomplished. I began to remember many things about Craig and our former circle of friends. One thing that was somewhat lacking in his memorial was his Sigma Chi circle of friends. His fraternity connection was barely mentioned. We all know a lot more about Craig’s Sigma Chi connection. I also began to reflect on my own connection with where Craig grew up. It was my good fortune to live with my step father, mother and sister (Vivien Powers) in Pt. Neches. Vivien and I commuted to Lamar while living at home. Many of us did this, including Craig Ponder. On occasion Craig and I would ride together. I suppose the other reason that Craig’s death was so reflective for me is because my sister, Vivien, graduated from Pt. Neches in 1959 and Craig in 1960. Port Neches became my adoptive hometown and PNG my second high school. I never went to PNG, but I have been very much connected since I began visiting there during the summers starting in 1947. You can not be around PNG people without feeling their enthusiasm for their school and their town. I did much of my “growing up” in the Golden Triangle”. From 1958-1962 I commuted to Lamar and graduated in 1962. Craig was one of the several Port Neches people that I already knew because of Vivien. She was involved in everything at PNG as well as at Lamar. Viv was a nominee for Sweetheart of Sigma Chi. As Viviens’s 1959 graduation year approaches, many other memories have begun to surface. Vivien and her husband, Mac Ingram (one of my best friends) were killed in a car accident in 1967. I have recently been going through all of Vivien things and so I have had Pt. Neches on my mind. Craig’s passing has added to these old memories. In 1961 Craig, along with the other charter members of Epsilon Chi, were initiated into Sigma Chi. This historic event was the culmination of many years of hard work by our local Kappa Phi group. Craig Ponder was a big contributing factor in all of this. We were initiated jointly with Sam Houston, Feb 11, 1961 at the old Shamrock Hilton in downtown Houston. Prior to this in Beaumont, we all were given our Sigma Chi manuals and told to study for a Sigma Chi History exam as part of our initiation. The reason that I mention this is because I remember Craig made one of the highest scores , not only in our group, but one of the highest in the nation. This came as no surprise to anyone who knew Craig. During a earlier semester Craig and I ended up in the same Organic Chemistry class.. He set the curve for the class. I did too, but on the other end.
My brothers, Craig's family and friends, we salute the life of this outstanding individual. May his memories always remain in our hearts as we each pursue our own destiny. All honor to his name.